Go Back   United Bimmer Community - BMW Forum > UnitedBimmer- Off Topic > United Off Topic  **FOR MEMBERS ONLY** > Comedy Collection
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Advertise With Us Mark Forums Read

Comedy Collection
Post up anything funny you find online here. Could be flash videos, amusing websites, text jokes, anything.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 01-20-2008, 05:07 PM   #1
jcjdavis1
 
jcjdavis1's Avatar

Name: jcjdavis1
Title: United Newb
Status: Offline
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Paisley Scotland
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: 1989 320i tourer
oldies having sex

A couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist's office.

The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?

The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?'

The doctor raises both eyebrows , but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse.' He thanks them for coming, wishes them good luck, charges them Ł50, and says goodbye.

The next week, however, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees. This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an
appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leaves.

Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'

The old man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. Marriot charge $93. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Healthcare
__________________
The older I get the wrong bits get stiff!!!
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2008, 06:05 PM   #2
witeshark
 
witeshark's Avatar

Name: witeshark
Title: Suspended License
Status: Offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Miami FL
Rate My Car: 84 / 340
Your Ride: 89 325i 5 speed
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2008, 06:58 PM   #3
Tuco

Name: Tuco
Title: United Newb
Status: Offline
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Italy - Sardinia
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: 520i E34 Individual
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2008, 07:23 PM   #4
craig
 
craig's Avatar

Name: craig
Title: Sitting in Time out
Status: Offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: tribune kansas
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
LOL
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2008, 10:23 PM   #5
pj69pl

Name: pj69pl
Title: Member
Status: Offline
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Elk grove, IL
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: 1989 325is
Hahaha
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 12:08 AM   #6
Numark318i
 
Numark318i's Avatar

Name: Numark318i
Title: has an empty wallet
Status: Offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Only place in the world where people say "Hella"
Rate My Car: 125 / 340
Your Ride: ^^
ahaha.
__________________
We all get the urge...Saturday early morning...nothing to do till noon... BMW FTW

The aural sensations of 1st gear WOT
**CGM **(Certified Garage Mechanic)
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 12:57 AM   #7
compactdisc
 
compactdisc's Avatar

Name: compactdisc
Title: United Newb
Status: Offline
Join Date: Sep 2007
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: 93' 325is
thats gooood
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 01:34 PM   #8
Exilion
 
Exilion's Avatar

Name: Exilion
Title: Senior Member
Status: Offline
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: World wide
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: 1991 325i
Nice
__________________


BMW's are made by god... kinda
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 05:03 PM   #9
denyo77
 
denyo77's Avatar

Name: denyo77
Title: Suspended License
Status: Offline
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Germany
Rate My Car: 198 / 340
Your Ride: 1988 325i Touring
uh... 80 year olds having sex...
but a good joke nonetheless
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 10:29 PM   #10
mullethunter3
 
mullethunter3's Avatar

Name: mullethunter3
Title: Upgraded Member
Status: Offline
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Saint Louis / RollaMO
Rate My Car: 158 / 340
Your Ride: 318is, Suzuki GS500
Quote:
Originally Posted by denyo77 View Post
uh... 80 year olds having sex...

Um, am I the only one here who wants to be having sex at 80+ still?
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2008, 10:16 AM   #11
denyo77
 
denyo77's Avatar

Name: denyo77
Title: Suspended License
Status: Offline
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Germany
Rate My Car: 198 / 340
Your Ride: 1988 325i Touring
no, I meant watching 80-year-olds having sex
  Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2008, 07:03 AM   #12
ibiza
 
ibiza's Avatar

Name: ibiza
Title: United Newb
Status: Offline
Join Date: May 2007
User not setup in Rate My Car.
Click here to set it up.
Your Ride: pendou=))
hahaha.. genius coupe
__________________
drive it like it's stolen..


yellow
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Seven Kinds of Sex Chris Comedy Collection
6 08-17-2007 07:27 PM
Philosophies of Sex (txt) CAPiTUL Comedy Collection
3 07-29-2007 06:38 PM
Sex Addict? Find out HERE! CAPiTUL United Off Topic  **FOR MEMBERS ONLY** 2 05-13-2006 06:06 PM
To All The Girls I've Loved Before komodo Comedy Collection
8 03-06-2006 10:02 PM
Halloween > Sex Dudesky Comedy Collection
0 11-01-2005 05:19 AM


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:47 AM.

A vBSkinworks Design

 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright © 2005-2013 UnitedBimmer.com