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| Comedy Collection Post up anything funny you find online here. Could be flash videos, amusing websites, text jokes, anything. |
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10-03-2005, 10:05 AM
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Headlines from the Year 2029
News Headlines from the Year 2029 - Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formally known as California. - White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language. - Baby conceived naturally - - scientists stumped. - Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage. - Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels. - France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. - Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking. - George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036. - Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only. - 85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss. - Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs. - Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut. - Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative. - Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. - Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches. - New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036. - Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts. - Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman. - IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent. - Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines
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10-05-2005, 12:10 PM
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the last one was a given. knew it would be there. some of those are funny. seriously, harry wehre do you get all these jokes?
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 Nuke (n): a large firework that makes pretty lights and large lakes out of annoying countries. You have three choices, stand behind our troops, grab a gun and toe the line with our troops, or stand in front of them, they can use the extra armor. |
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10-05-2005, 12:57 PM
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Quote:
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