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05-16-2005, 11:04 PM
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#1 |
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Cats and Dogs Thoughts
As seen in a dog's diary: 7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite! 8 am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite! 9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite! Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite! 2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite! 3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite! 4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite! 6 pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite! 7 pm - Oh boy! Dad! My favorite! 8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite! 11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in a people bed! My favorite! As seen in a cat's diary: Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies". Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
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05-16-2005, 11:25 PM
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#2 | |
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Lmao, good one, I hate cats, lol
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05-18-2005, 03:52 AM
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#3 |
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nice
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 BMW, The Ultimate Driving Machine |
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05-18-2005, 12:17 PM
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#4 |
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Yo! That is truly a work of art! Ima laugh all day long at it, even in traffic!  |
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05-18-2005, 12:40 PM
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05-18-2005, 01:28 PM
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#6 |
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Haha that is some good shit. |
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05-18-2005, 03:34 PM
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#7 |
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hmm maybe I would rather get a dog then
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| Dogs vs Cats | komodo | United Off Topic **FOR MEMBERS ONLY** | 37 | 05-21-2005 05:19 PM |
