Ah... now for the pics.
Before anything was done, this is the ol pine tree.
After traveling to Home Depot, tow chain and some sort of tensioner assembly bought, attached the assembly to the Escape and the tow chain ~1/2 to 2/3 up the pine.
And pull....

The tensioner had about six feet of slack, when tightened, ^^that was the result.
View from inside the "truck":
And here we have Arbor Erectus:

Yea, I know it's still crooked, but, the trunk has always leaned out, so this is pretty much how it's looked for 40 years. Sorry the pic is dark, it rained a few minutes after this pic was taken.
The makeshift support, made from two 2x4's with a 3.5in bolt making a cradle while the pine resituates itself.
Soooo....
Tow Chain...$36
Tensioner...$35
Bolt, washer, nut and drill bit...$4.55
Making the old man's day... Priceless
Dough