A recent addition:
Little Johnny was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical came up-- fireman, policeman, salesman, etc. Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father.
"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay bar and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes, if the offers really good, he'll go out to the alley with some guy and make love with him for money."
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring, and took little Johnny aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?", " No," said David, "He plays for the INDIANAPOLIS COLTS, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids!